But there is one place in my life that I have so much trouble with that learning to smile anyway with regards to it is something I've only begun to do in the more recent past. It's my body.
I'm not talking massive bouts of self-loathing at all, but I'm definitely not satisfied. I never have been. I was a ballet dancer from ages 4-18. Believe me when I say that the 35-year-old me has wanted a time machine many times to go back and slap the 120-lb 18-year-old me a few times for not being satisfied then.
It's not just a weight issue. It's my issues with not ever losing a pound - even when I was on the UNL cycling team. Not a dang-blasted pound. I started the season at 165 and ended at 165. And was 4th fastest adult female in the state of Nebraska in 2002. I was hot. And the scale didn't budge.
What I'm really not satisfied with are a lifelong battle with mysteriously dropping blood sugars. Normally low blood pressure (90/48) - causing me to get woozy and blackout if I stand up too fast. Heart flutters. Fatigue. Have I mentioned infertility? Who knows what else? And I've had more inconclusive medical tests than I care to remember I paid for...
If willpower were all it took to lose weight or be active, I'd be the most amazing superwoman EVER. So, because of all of this, I have been on a never-ending quest to understand my physical body. Enter "The Blood Sugar Solution." I know I have talked about this before, but here's this week's wisdom that I have to pass on to you, today:
Revelation #1: PROCESSED FOOD IS ADDICTIVE. And I don't want anything to control me. Especially anything as insignificant as a candy bar.
And that brings me full circle to my insanity. I took all of the quizzes (I'll post one of them below) and found that not surprisingly I was lacking in several areas of nutrition. I'm on a journey to get all reset and become balanced physically. Monday (yes, the day after Easter), I began my detox journey. Things got a little bumpy as I approached the 4pm hour. I pushed through (and picked a really rotten time to consolidate the kids' candy while going sugar- and flour-free!). Tuesday was worse. If I was blogging about this yesterday, I would not be so full of smiles as I am, now.
Revelation #2: I HAVE SOME REALLY BAD HABITS. But that is changing this week as I am becoming aware of them by detoxing my addiction to sugar.
Today, by comparison, has been remarkably easy. THANK GOODNESS! I don't think I could have handled another day like yesterday. What helped get through? All of that willpower I have? Ummmm... maybe a little - but it was more accurately 'determination.' The biggest difference was all of Arbonne's sugar-free, gluten-free, vegan certified, naturally-energy-boosting helpers. Protein powders to ensure proper nutrition. Fizz sticks for a vitamin-filled energy boost (without the crash you get from sugar & caffeine). Fit chews to get over the need to binge. And a nice, relaxing tea to help in my efforts to detox and remove my addiction to sugar. So, as day 3 comes to a close, I am very happy to report that, unlike yesterday, I am all smiles, again. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment